Not a whole lot out of the ordinary going on here. School is in session. The kids have started their activities, which means each night is busy!
We hope to spend a few minutes together as a family each night, but it's not easy. I struggle with the amount of time we spend together. I have these images in my head of us eating together each night. Kicked back in our chairs, a perfectly healthy meal on the table, all of us talking and laughing. Of course that doesn't exist.
Here's the deal...even if we had the time that wouldn't happen. Not for long. Maybe 5 minutes. In reality it would be Will complaining about what I fixed, Abby crawling from chair to chair, Chris digging through his food to pick out every single vegetable, Hanna telling Will he should just eat, Zac playing loudly with his toys at the table (he might even have the Ipad going.) It's chaos with a little bit of conversation mixed in. Do all families exist this way? Please say yes!
Regardless, we strive for our time together. Amidst the chaos we do hear how our days have gone and what each of us has done. Each child gets to share. No, there is no particular order and yes you do have to yell so your mom and dad can hear over the other noise, but it is our family ritual. The one our crazy little family created together.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Starting again
Our summer vacation has come to end. Sigh. All good things do.
As I look back, I think about all of the firsts. The first time all the kids had their own bed. The first time we had a pool. The first time I used sunscreen on the kids and myself consistently all summer! The first time we are at this time of year and I am truly NOT ready for them to go back to school.
We laughed, we fought, we traveled to Kentucky, Florida, and Arkansas. We walked our new puppy alot. We bought numerous fans and placed them all around our house in the heatwave Oklahoma suffered. We got in the car to see how hot it was several time a day. We hid in the dark places in our home to stay cool. We baked and baked when it was too hot to be outside. Mint chocolate chip ice cream cake, Chocolate chip reese's cookies, Ice cream sandwich cake and many more.
We watched Animal Planet alot. Did I ever think I would watch Hillbilly Handfishin'? Absolutely not. But we did.
Now I must look forward. Hanna is going into 7th grade. Will is in 4th. Zac starts Pre-K. I am so excited for each of them. My heart is heavy. This time tomorrow I will be fine too. But for now my babies are growing up and I don't like it one bit! I like them here with me.
As I look back, I think about all of the firsts. The first time all the kids had their own bed. The first time we had a pool. The first time I used sunscreen on the kids and myself consistently all summer! The first time we are at this time of year and I am truly NOT ready for them to go back to school.
We laughed, we fought, we traveled to Kentucky, Florida, and Arkansas. We walked our new puppy alot. We bought numerous fans and placed them all around our house in the heatwave Oklahoma suffered. We got in the car to see how hot it was several time a day. We hid in the dark places in our home to stay cool. We baked and baked when it was too hot to be outside. Mint chocolate chip ice cream cake, Chocolate chip reese's cookies, Ice cream sandwich cake and many more.
We watched Animal Planet alot. Did I ever think I would watch Hillbilly Handfishin'? Absolutely not. But we did.
Now I must look forward. Hanna is going into 7th grade. Will is in 4th. Zac starts Pre-K. I am so excited for each of them. My heart is heavy. This time tomorrow I will be fine too. But for now my babies are growing up and I don't like it one bit! I like them here with me.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Irony of committment
So today I was reading a blog post on LuLuLemon Athletica. Here is what I found within the post:
“The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating…. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
Seems so fitting for where I am right now. In the middle of making and evaluating all of our commitments! This time of year is crazy for moms. We are getting our kids ready for school. Sounds easy right? Not so. They need clothes, shoes, underwear, school supplies, backpacks, lunch boxes. We have well child checks, dentist , orthodontist, and eye appointments. Fall activities are beginning or on the horizon. Our schedules are coming together. And yes summer is ending. But it's not over, and you want to make sure they have a great time so that means planning things for them to do right now. Can you say overload?
It makes sense with all of this going on in our children's lives that we pull back and refuse to commit for ourselves. However, the quote above reminded me of what comes when I choose that route. It's a sense of being trapped in my life, instead of living it the way I like to live it. It's knowing that I can have a life I love if I take the first step forward instead of back. Here I go with all the craziness and things to do, I am still going to commit to me...(that's me stepping forward!)
“The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating…. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
Seems so fitting for where I am right now. In the middle of making and evaluating all of our commitments! This time of year is crazy for moms. We are getting our kids ready for school. Sounds easy right? Not so. They need clothes, shoes, underwear, school supplies, backpacks, lunch boxes. We have well child checks, dentist , orthodontist, and eye appointments. Fall activities are beginning or on the horizon. Our schedules are coming together. And yes summer is ending. But it's not over, and you want to make sure they have a great time so that means planning things for them to do right now. Can you say overload?
It makes sense with all of this going on in our children's lives that we pull back and refuse to commit for ourselves. However, the quote above reminded me of what comes when I choose that route. It's a sense of being trapped in my life, instead of living it the way I like to live it. It's knowing that I can have a life I love if I take the first step forward instead of back. Here I go with all the craziness and things to do, I am still going to commit to me...(that's me stepping forward!)
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Committment
In today's world commitment is a very dirty word. You can think of many reasons I would guess not to commit to all sorts of things. We all do. I'm the best at "not committing." So good in fact, that I do it all the time! I have four children. That gives me all kinds of chances to say, "I can't commit."
I mentioned in an earlier post I read "Have a little Faith" while in Florida. The Rabbi talks about our generations inability to commit, especially to Church. Vacation was the perfect time for me to process this information! No commitments, no where to go. Just the black and white words on the page. He was right. I have a commitment issue. Darn! I thought I was divvying our time up among all the things we enjoyed doing. I didn't realize that a little bit of this and little bit of that what was really my attempt to "not commit."
So, I've accepted it, first step, right? Well, I've actually acted on it too. I volunteered at church Saturday (seemed like the logical place to start since the Rabbi mentioned it and all). It felt good.
I know we have all volunteered and done this and that, but have we committed? Have we really committed to a better community, church, school, team, family, or whatever it may be? I don't think so. I know I haven't.
Hopefully you aren't like me, and this isn't an issue for you. I know some of you could write a post on overcommitment. If it turns it out that you are like me, then join me. Start somewhere.
On a more serious note, if you see me, please do not try and trick me and ask me to do a whole bunch of things that know one else wants to do. I intend to pick my commitments carefully. Very, very carefully.
I mentioned in an earlier post I read "Have a little Faith" while in Florida. The Rabbi talks about our generations inability to commit, especially to Church. Vacation was the perfect time for me to process this information! No commitments, no where to go. Just the black and white words on the page. He was right. I have a commitment issue. Darn! I thought I was divvying our time up among all the things we enjoyed doing. I didn't realize that a little bit of this and little bit of that what was really my attempt to "not commit."
So, I've accepted it, first step, right? Well, I've actually acted on it too. I volunteered at church Saturday (seemed like the logical place to start since the Rabbi mentioned it and all). It felt good.
I know we have all volunteered and done this and that, but have we committed? Have we really committed to a better community, church, school, team, family, or whatever it may be? I don't think so. I know I haven't.
Hopefully you aren't like me, and this isn't an issue for you. I know some of you could write a post on overcommitment. If it turns it out that you are like me, then join me. Start somewhere.
On a more serious note, if you see me, please do not try and trick me and ask me to do a whole bunch of things that know one else wants to do. I intend to pick my commitments carefully. Very, very carefully.
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Cussing
Only days after I unlock one of the doors to a fulfilling life, I learn I again have failed as a parent. Zac, my 4 year old, is cussing like a sailor. Why? Why Zac? He has no answer. I'm pretty sure his older brother introduced him to the movie Benchwarmers.
Where is Zac now? In his room crying because we have banned this movie for a long time! Devastating.
Where is Zac now? In his room crying because we have banned this movie for a long time! Devastating.
Enjoying the moment
I've been thinking about life and legacies recently. My grandmother just turned 80 and we had a big Birthday party for her. In the days prior to the party, I thought deeply about what she meant to me over the years. In Florida on vacation, I read a book, "Have a little Faith" by Mitch Albom. Loved it! It's about a rabbi who is nearing the end of his life and, he asks the author to deliver his eulogy.
Both of these made me think about what I will pass onto my children. What is my legacy to them? These two remarkable people, the rabbi and my grandmother, passed on tradition and stability. He is a rabbi who believed deeply in his culture and faith. He was very methodical in his life. He lived in only 3 houses, didn't wear fancy clothes or drive luxury vehicles. Neither did my Grandmother. She raised children. Cooked and cleaned each and everyday of her life including now. They LIVED life, it didn't pass them by.
My life is so crazy at times, I feel like it is passing me by. I'm always trying to get this done so I can move onto the next thing never even realizing I have completed the first. We've lived in 5 houses already! We are inundated we places to go, things to buy, what others are doing that we aren't. Previous generations weren't. We have too many choices to make ALL the time. It's driving me crazier than I was!
I feel in looking back at previous generations there has to be a lesson to learn. This time, I've learned I want my children to feel me in their everyday lives. That my everyday life can be that, just everyday. My legacy will be passed on in what I do everyday.
Maybe they will think of me when they are making banana, chocolate chip pancakes on Saturday or dragging their children to church on Sunday. As they are picking up their children's clothes off the floor, maybe they will hear my voice in their memory asking them to do the same. We are a long way off from these scenarios, but I want to remind myself that what I do now with my family will be my legacy one day.
I am making it now, we all are. So, take a deep breath, don't schedule your life away. Join me in enjoying the moment.
Both of these made me think about what I will pass onto my children. What is my legacy to them? These two remarkable people, the rabbi and my grandmother, passed on tradition and stability. He is a rabbi who believed deeply in his culture and faith. He was very methodical in his life. He lived in only 3 houses, didn't wear fancy clothes or drive luxury vehicles. Neither did my Grandmother. She raised children. Cooked and cleaned each and everyday of her life including now. They LIVED life, it didn't pass them by.
My life is so crazy at times, I feel like it is passing me by. I'm always trying to get this done so I can move onto the next thing never even realizing I have completed the first. We've lived in 5 houses already! We are inundated we places to go, things to buy, what others are doing that we aren't. Previous generations weren't. We have too many choices to make ALL the time. It's driving me crazier than I was!
I feel in looking back at previous generations there has to be a lesson to learn. This time, I've learned I want my children to feel me in their everyday lives. That my everyday life can be that, just everyday. My legacy will be passed on in what I do everyday.
Maybe they will think of me when they are making banana, chocolate chip pancakes on Saturday or dragging their children to church on Sunday. As they are picking up their children's clothes off the floor, maybe they will hear my voice in their memory asking them to do the same. We are a long way off from these scenarios, but I want to remind myself that what I do now with my family will be my legacy one day.
I am making it now, we all are. So, take a deep breath, don't schedule your life away. Join me in enjoying the moment.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Eat, clean, eat, clean
Would you like to know why I haven't posted? I thought so. Because....here's my day
Wake up, stumble out of bed much later than usual because our new puppy has yet to sleep through the night. Make coffee. Feed dog. Walk dog.
Kid #1 is up (not really the 1st just the 1st up) breakfast made for him. Breakfast cleaned up for him.
Kid #2 up. He doesn't like breakfast right away. Unload dishes from day before.
Kid #3 up. She is into everything. Usually doing something like eating Nutella directly out of the jar with her fingers, while I am trying to have an adult conversation.
Feed #2, #3. #1 kid leaves for the day only to return a few hours later with a couple of friends to swim. Clean up after #2, #3. Laundry.
Last child is up. She wants breakfast. We argue because it is after 11 and time for lunch.
Time for lunch for #1 and his friends. Clean up. Lunch for #2, #3. Clean up.
See? Currently dreaming of the getaway I must take as soon as summer as over!
Wake up, stumble out of bed much later than usual because our new puppy has yet to sleep through the night. Make coffee. Feed dog. Walk dog.
Kid #1 is up (not really the 1st just the 1st up) breakfast made for him. Breakfast cleaned up for him.
Kid #2 up. He doesn't like breakfast right away. Unload dishes from day before.
Kid #3 up. She is into everything. Usually doing something like eating Nutella directly out of the jar with her fingers, while I am trying to have an adult conversation.
Feed #2, #3. #1 kid leaves for the day only to return a few hours later with a couple of friends to swim. Clean up after #2, #3. Laundry.
Last child is up. She wants breakfast. We argue because it is after 11 and time for lunch.
Time for lunch for #1 and his friends. Clean up. Lunch for #2, #3. Clean up.
See? Currently dreaming of the getaway I must take as soon as summer as over!
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Precious days
I meant to do this several days ago, but you know how that goes! Well, there was a big reason for the babysitter. It was a surprise party. My 40th Birthday party. In order to appreciate this, you must know how I've acted about turning 40.
It's not good. I wasn't very nice. I didn't like that idea. First, it was wrinkles, mine that is. Then it was the whole skin cancer thing I had to deal with. Just one thing after another. Lots of reminders that yes I am getting older, whether I feel like it or not.
My response was to ignore my birthday. Pretty simple. Not happening. Just skipping over April 19th. That worked for me but ...not for my Mom. Because yes, even with 4 kids, I am still a daughter. Hers. So, she, Chris, and my friends planned a party for me. It was a reminder to me that each day is precious. Precious to someone. April 19th is precious for my mom just as my kids birthday's are to me. (Pardon my overuse of precious, it just worked for me!)
Sometimes the best choice we can make is to let someone else do something for us, because THEY want to.
By the way, I loved my birthday! I loved having everyone together in one place, even if I had to turn 40 to do it!
It's not good. I wasn't very nice. I didn't like that idea. First, it was wrinkles, mine that is. Then it was the whole skin cancer thing I had to deal with. Just one thing after another. Lots of reminders that yes I am getting older, whether I feel like it or not.
My response was to ignore my birthday. Pretty simple. Not happening. Just skipping over April 19th. That worked for me but ...not for my Mom. Because yes, even with 4 kids, I am still a daughter. Hers. So, she, Chris, and my friends planned a party for me. It was a reminder to me that each day is precious. Precious to someone. April 19th is precious for my mom just as my kids birthday's are to me. (Pardon my overuse of precious, it just worked for me!)
Sometimes the best choice we can make is to let someone else do something for us, because THEY want to.
By the way, I loved my birthday! I loved having everyone together in one place, even if I had to turn 40 to do it!
Friday, April 22, 2011
Do do do do, do do do do
Just wanted to let you know.Something weird is going on in my house. My husband got a babysitter. All by himself. Do do do do (to the Twilight Zone tune).
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Crazy becomes crazier!
It's been a very long time since you heard from me! So long, in fact that I have officially turned 40 over the break from blogging. Finally, 40. Thank God. Dreading turning 40 was really zapping a lot of my energy.
In addition to that, we have sold a house and moved. Moved with 4 kids. Wow. No, I mean WOW! That will never happen again. This is our 5th house. We will stay for a while. We will throw more things away. We will try to recover from the pain inflicted on this adventure.
So our crazy life became crazier. I thought about writing but I didn't. But now I am. Now that I am 40.
In addition to that, we have sold a house and moved. Moved with 4 kids. Wow. No, I mean WOW! That will never happen again. This is our 5th house. We will stay for a while. We will throw more things away. We will try to recover from the pain inflicted on this adventure.
So our crazy life became crazier. I thought about writing but I didn't. But now I am. Now that I am 40.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Oh, Snow you didn't!
Snow, snow, and more snow. Oklahoma has been completely covered. We haven't been in school since Monday. Wow! It's family time whether we like or not. Our family has been busy doing a whole lot of nothing. Here goes:
Playing with friends. Mom playing with her new app, Instagram.
Snuggling with babies
Throwing a big chunk of ice at my sister, which makes her really mad.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Our thoroughbreds
Ok, since we put our house on the market, it has snowed alot. Alot, alot, alot, alot. We are in my parents home, we have all had a virus that includes throwing up, and it is still snowing. Not kidding.
While being locked up and unable to go outside we have watched movies. Several of them. My favorite so far has been Secretariat.
In order to fully understand my connection to this movie, you must know I am from Kentucky. Lexington, KY, horse country. I have grown up around horses (notice I said around, I don't actually get on them). I guess in some way horses are in my blood. I love to look at them, watch them, especially run as fast as their long powerful legs will take them. Which of course, Secretariat did very well. All horse movies are my favorite.
I'm sure in some way we can all relate to the mom in this movie. The one who owned Secretariat. Finally, after years of putting her family first she did what she wanted to do, which was watch the horse race. Point #1 that I love.
Secretariat was successfull because he was fast, but also because he had people who BELIEVED in him unconditionally. They never backed down or doubted that he could do it. They wholeheartedly loved and believed in him. Point #2 that I love!!!
That is what we as moms should do. Believe in our children, go to bat for them all the time, anytime, anywhere. I know oftentimes we want to take a bat after them. (Just kidding, kind of.) That is differerent. That is against the law.
So, girls, you go. You go out there and you treat your family like the thoroughbred that it is. You believe in them, love them, and cheer them on always. I do realize how cheesy this all sounds, but I believe it.
I believe in cheering all our children on!
While being locked up and unable to go outside we have watched movies. Several of them. My favorite so far has been Secretariat.
In order to fully understand my connection to this movie, you must know I am from Kentucky. Lexington, KY, horse country. I have grown up around horses (notice I said around, I don't actually get on them). I guess in some way horses are in my blood. I love to look at them, watch them, especially run as fast as their long powerful legs will take them. Which of course, Secretariat did very well. All horse movies are my favorite.
I'm sure in some way we can all relate to the mom in this movie. The one who owned Secretariat. Finally, after years of putting her family first she did what she wanted to do, which was watch the horse race. Point #1 that I love.
Secretariat was successfull because he was fast, but also because he had people who BELIEVED in him unconditionally. They never backed down or doubted that he could do it. They wholeheartedly loved and believed in him. Point #2 that I love!!!
That is what we as moms should do. Believe in our children, go to bat for them all the time, anytime, anywhere. I know oftentimes we want to take a bat after them. (Just kidding, kind of.) That is differerent. That is against the law.
So, girls, you go. You go out there and you treat your family like the thoroughbred that it is. You believe in them, love them, and cheer them on always. I do realize how cheesy this all sounds, but I believe it.
I believe in cheering all our children on!
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Exhaustion
I passed out last night, half on carpet, half on wood floors. No alcohol involved, just sheer exhaustion! Kids were still up watching Shrek Forever. Wow. Of course, I'm up now and they are still sleeping. Except for Abby who is in my lap playing with her favorite toy, my Iphone.
So, what has happened lately you ask? I can't remember. I'm literally day to day.The kids were out of school on Thursday and Friday. I was forced to go sledding even though it was freezing! I don't remember my parents sledding with us, why must I go? It's cold. I don't like being cold.
Our big project right now is preparing our house to sell it. That is hard work. The worst part of all is now our house looks awesome, and we have to give it up. Sad. Also sad that we have picked one of the worst times ever to sell our house. Hoping for the best. Will keep you posted!
A few pics from the last few weeks:
So, what has happened lately you ask? I can't remember. I'm literally day to day.The kids were out of school on Thursday and Friday. I was forced to go sledding even though it was freezing! I don't remember my parents sledding with us, why must I go? It's cold. I don't like being cold.
Our big project right now is preparing our house to sell it. That is hard work. The worst part of all is now our house looks awesome, and we have to give it up. Sad. Also sad that we have picked one of the worst times ever to sell our house. Hoping for the best. Will keep you posted!
A few pics from the last few weeks:
Another tournament win for Will, this time in basketball.
This was the celebration after at Eskimo Joe's. Yummy!
New haircut. Not sure why she looks so scared. Possibly working on her acting technique.
Playdate with friends.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Our New Year hair dos
Our year has begun as it usually does. Getting rid of all those things we no longer need or use. Oh so fun! In the midst of cleaning and purging, Zac, Abby and I took a little break on the trampoline...
I was too tired from laughing to continue the cleaning and purging.
I was too tired from laughing to continue the cleaning and purging.
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